Just wanted to take a moment (finally) to let you know that our little girl was born at home on September 8, 2011! Yes, it’s taken me 6 weeks to get this announcement out to you; sorry about that! We are all happy, healthy, and only a little sleep deprived! Needless to say life is crazy and if you haven’t noticed, I will be taking a short break from writing on my blog.

In my absence I do hope to have several guest bloggers writing interesting content for you to read – stay tuned!

In the meantime, here are a few photos of our new family, her birth slideshow (below), and birth story for you to read. And some of my previous articles on midwives, homebirth, and natural childbirth.

Have any of you birthed at home or with a midwife? Leave a comment and share!

shortly after birth

big brother loves his sister!

us with our midwife

our new family, taken about 3 weeks after birth

We hired a birth photographer to document our special moment and we couldn’t be happier with the results!

• Sneak peek at some photos (if you just have a minute)
• Birth slideshow set to music (if you have a few more minutes)

Curious about midwives and homebirth? Read some of my previous articles on the topics:

• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 1: Misconceptions and Facts About Midwives
• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 2: Safety
• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 3: Who Chooses Midwifery Care?
• 8 Ways Midwives Promote Safe Childbirth
• How to Have a Natural Childbirth

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Related Articles:

• Easy Way to Get Cheap Pregnancy Tests for Less Than 25 Cents Per Test
• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 1: Misconceptions and Facts About Midwives
• Movie Review: The Business of Being Born

Cheap and Accurate Pregnancy Tests

I wanted to tell you about some cheap pregnancy tests that are extremely accurate. I’ve used these simple tests with both of my pregnancies and was able to confirm a positive result around 10 days past ovulation (DPO). Of course individual results can vary. The little tests strips I bought are FDA approved with a sensitivity level of 20 mIU/ml, which is more sensitive than most other pregnancy tests, and an accuracy of over 99%. I paid around 60 cents per test for mine, but I found some on Amazon.com even cheaper; you can get these pregnancy test strips for about 21 cents per test! You heard me right; isn’t that awesome!?

pregnancy test strip and a urine collection cup (purchased separately)

How It Works

Each test strip is individually wrapped. The one drawback (if you can even call it that) is that these are not midstream tests; you do have to collect urine in a cup. You then dip the stick into the urine up to a marked line on the strip. Results are to be read within 10 minutes; I usually saw results within a few minutes, sometimes within 30 seconds. A positive result is two lines, a  negative result is one line (the test line).

To collect the urine you can use those small disposable cups, although if you have something you can use over and over it would help out the environment!

positive result (two lines)

Where to Buy

I found these Wondfo pregnancy test strips on Amazon.com that look exactly like the ones I used – and they are cheaper!

So, do you like spending $10/test? Or would you rather spend 21 cents per pregnancy test? If you are needing pregnancy tests, try these out!

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• Our Sweet Daughter Has Arrived!

Home Births on the Rise

The number of home births in the United States rose 20% over four years (2004-2008). While still a small percentage (fewer than 1 percent of U.S. births occur at home) that is an indication of a natural birth trend. More and more women are choosing the care of a midwife and opting for natural childbirth. Why? Women are educating themselves about birth.

As a result of this natural birth trend there are many women who want a natural childbirth, but will only consider birthing in a hospital. Having a natural childbirth in a hospital can be very difficult to achieve with the current medical model of birthing that hospitals, OBs, and nursing staff follow. Unfortunately many pregnant women who want a natural childbirth in a hospital will not end up with one, for a variety of reasons.

Who Uses a Midwife for Natural Childbirth?

There is a small percentage of those pregnant women who *really* want a natural childbirth and realize their best option for success is to have a midwife attend their birth. But who are these women? Why do they choose to birth this way?

Misconceptions About Women Who Choose Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth

Before we discuss who chooses midwife-supported natural childbirth, I want to share with you some common misconceptions about women who use midwives:

• Only poor people use midwives.
• Only people without insurance use midwives.
• Only hippie freaks and uber crunchy people use midwives.
• Women who want to give birth in a hut in the woods use midwives.
• Only religious fundamentalists use midwives.
• Women who are ignorant about birth safety use midwives.
• Women who love pain use midwives.

Refuting the Misconceptions

The cost of a typical birth at home is usually less than half of that of a normal, uncomplicated birth in the hospital. This does make home birth, or birth in a birth center with a midwife, more available to people of all income levels. However, people with plenty of money still opt for care from midwives (for many of the reasons below) and many midwives accept insurance.

Women who choose care with a midwife tend to be more informed about childbirth options compared with women receiving care from a medical doctor. Women who choose care with a midwife come from all backgrounds, beliefs, and walks of life. Many well educated women, doctors, lawyers, and minister’s wives, nurses, teachers, homeschoolers, and stay-at-home moms choose home birth.

I doubt women choose natural childbirth because they “love pain” any more than women who choose to do other painful things such as tattoos, piercings, breast enhancement, plastic surgery, or wearing uncomfortable shoes, as Ina May Gaskin, famous US midwife, mentions in her book Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth. We are not crazy, martyrs, or masochists; just people who know about the benefits of natural birth. I did not choose my comfort during labor as the most important aspect of childbirth; I know pain is part of the process. But I worked with my body and the pain, accepted it, and did not fear it. That makes a huge difference in how painful the experience can be.

me at 37 weeks with my first child

Our story: My college degree is in Electrical Engineering, as is my husband’s. For the birth of our first child (in a free-standing birth center with a midwife attending) my insurance plan covered everything (prenatal appointments, lab work, ultrasound, birth, etc.) except a small deductible. (Getting them to “remember” that midwife coverage was in my plan is another story. But insurance companies are just frustrating like that, aren’t they?)

For this baby’s birth, we are using the same midwives at the birth center but are choosing a home birth. We now have a private insurance plan that does not cover maternity care so we are paying for all birth expenses ourselves.

The Women Who Choose Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth

Here are some of the reasons that I’ve been able to put together to help shed light on why women choose midwife-supported natural childbirth:

• Women who want their birth honored as sacred and normal
  

  me and my 10 day old son

• Women who trust that their bodies know how to have babies
• Women who don’t want unnecessary interventions, over medicalized childbirth, and its consequences
• Women who want to reclaim something that was taken away from them (empowerment)
• Women who want to take an active role in their prenatal care
• Women who want to be heard by their health care provider and work as a team
• Women who want to be the primary decision-maker in their pregnancy and birth
• Women who want more control over their bodies
• Women who want more control over what happens to their babies after birth
• Women who want to make decisions regarding their body and their baby (instead of doctors or hospital policy)
• Women who don’t want to be separated from their babies
• Women who want their desires and wishes treated as normal
• Women who have had an unpleasant experience with a hospital birth
• Women who want a woman-centered birth
• Women who want more nurturing
• Women who want more time and attention from their health care provider
• Women who prefer the holistic nature of natural childbirth
• Women who want peace, quiet, and respect for their birth
• Women who want to birth in a comfortable, private setting (birth center or home)
• Women who want their family (partner and children) involved and present at appointments and the birth
• Women whose religious beliefs prohibit them from using male doctors for childbirth
• Women who wish to develop longer-term relationships with those who attend their baby’s birth
• Women who see pregnancy not just a means to an end, but a journey of transformation: from a woman to a mother, from a couple to a family

For more reasons, and some interesting thoughts, check out this article on “Why Choose a Midwife?”

Midwife-Attended Births World Wide

Over 70% of births in the world are attended by midwives. In Europe as a whole, 75% of births have midwives as the care provider. Most of the countries with better statistics have one thing in common-midwives attend the majority of births.

In the Netherlands, midwives are the primary care providers for all low-risk pregnant women. Women who are at increased risk for complications are placed into “secondary care” with obstetricians.

Midwife-Attended Births in the United States

In 2003, approximately 8.0% of births in the United States were attended by midwives, more than double the 1990 rate of 3.9%. In six states (Alaska, Georgia, New Hampshire, New Mexico, Oregon, and Vermont), rates were at least twice as high as the national rate.

Would They Do it Again?

If you ask women who have had a natural birth with a midwife if they would do it again, I bet most (if not all) would say yes. It’s not because they love pain, it’s because they’ve discovered the feeling of empowerment. It was there all along, they just needed to tap into it.

And that’s what it’s all about: feeling empowered by your choice.

Our new family, minutes after birth

What were your reasons for choosing natural childbirth with a midwife? Please leave a comment and share!

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Related Articles:

• 8 Ways Midwives Promote Safe Childbirth
• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 2: Safety
• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 1: Misconceptions and Facts About Midwives
• Evidence-Based Maternity Care Report Released
• The Rights of Childbearing Women

As I mentioned in my article on whole food-based children’s vitamins, it is important to use whole food based vitamins instead of synthetic ones. Whole food based vitamins are easier on your system and more bio-available for absorption.

Problems With Synthetic Vitamins

• Synthetic vitamins are not as readily absorbed by the body as whole food nutrients are. Your body can absorb vitamins when all parts of the complex are present. In the case of a synthetic, isolated nutrient (a fraction of a vitamin), your body must supply the other parts of the complex, thus creating more work and deficiencies.
• Synthetic vitamins often contain harmful ingredients such as artificial flavors, artificial colorings, sugars, artificial sweeteners, hydrogenated oils, and preservatives.
• Synthetic vitamins often contain allergens.

Whole Food Supplements

Whole food supplements are made from concentrated whole foods. The vitamins in these supplements are not isolated; they combine a variety of enzymes, coenzymes, antioxidants, trace elements, activators, and many other unknown or undiscovered factors all working together synergistically to enable this vitamin complex to do its job in your body.

Dr. Mercola provides more information about whole food supplements vs synthetic.

New Chapter Organic Perfect Prenatal Vitamins

New Chapter Perfect Prenatal vitamins are whole food based and contain herbs, minerals, and probiotics. You take one per meal and they can even be taken on an empty stomach. Taking a tablet several times a day is easier (and better utilized) than once-a-day vitamins. Since the bottle contains 192 tablets, that comes out to 64 days or roughly two months.

What About Cost?

You may have heard of New Chapter Perfect Prenatal vitamins before but may have balked at the high price. Indeed, if you went to your local Whole Foods you might find them priced around $57/bottle (192 tablets). While that may or may not seem like a lot of money for a two-month supply of excellent vitamins, I am here to show you how you can save 39% on New Chapter Perfect Prenatal vitamins!

How To Get Discount on New Chapter Organic Perfect Prenatal Vitamins

As much as I love Whole Foods, if that is where you buy your New Chapter Perfect Prenatal vitamins you are paying too much!

Here’s how to get them cheaper:

1. Buy one bottle (192 count) on Amazon.com. Just by doing that the price drops to $41.24/bottle.
2. Sign up for Amazon.com’s Subscribe and Save. By having a bottle automatically ordered every so often (you choose the frequency) you save 15%, bringing the price down to $35.05/bottle.

Bonus: There is free shipping for Subscribe and Save!

Let’s do the math:

We just went from $57/bottle to $35/bottle, for a savings of 39%! Don’t you just love Amazon.com! And that’s for a two-month supply!

My Thoughts

I can’t believe I just thought about looking for vitamins on Amazon.com recently! I have ordered one shipment and now I have one bottle (192 count) scheduled to arrive every two months. Having used their Subscribe and Save for awhile now with diapers, I am completely confident in it. You can always change frequency or order more anytime and update the next shipment. It’s so easy!

How To Purchase

Simply click on New Chapter Organic Perfect Prenatal to take you to the Amazon.com product page. New Chapter Organic Perfect Prenatal vitamins are also listed in my Amazon.com store in the ‘Whole Food Vitamin’ category.

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I’ve had a hard time in the past trying to find a pair of active wear-type shoes that are easy to put on, comfortable, look nice, and go with everything – until now. Three months ago I found and purchased my first pair of kigo curv shoes (lower case intentional); they are perfect for me! While they seem to be even more perfect for those who REALLY like outdoor adventure such as hiking, canoeing, and running, I am a simple (pregnant) mom who has found these shoes to be essential to my wardrobe.

In a testament to how much I love them, I even have nice “kigo curv” tan lines on my feet, since these are the only shoes I have been wearing since I bought them over 3 months ago! Are you curious about them? Read on!

Flat Shoe – Better Posture

By being as close to barefoot as possible we can maintain the best posture, which is important any time but especially during pregnancy. A flat shoe promotes a more natural body position/alignment, similar to being barefoot. Any amount of heel lift can throw off posture. To illustrate this point, I want to share with you an entertaining video made by Patton Gleason of the Natural Running Store. (And if you don’t think a video about flat shoes and posture can be entertaining, then you’ve never witnessed the skills of Mr. Gleason!)

If you can’t see this video, click here.

Comfort

Looking at the simple, flat styling of the kigo curv you might wonder about their comfort – especially if you are used to thick shoes with lots of padding. But the moment I put them on I could feel their natural comfort. They have a removable insole that provides enough cushion while maintaining their flat profile. Adding to their comfort is the super flexible and thin (1.5mm) rubber outsole.

The more you wear them the more they seem to mold to your foot, almost like a second skin, creating a shoe that is just for you.

Styling

With a Mary-Jane style, the kigo curv is designed especially for women. I think they look great; a bit outdoorsy wilderness and city casual all in one. I have received several compliments on them and am happy to recommend them to others looking for this type of shoe.

They come in six color combinations. Being so practical, I chose the grey with white stitch so that I can wear them with anything – and I do! I wear them with shorts, skirts, crop pants, and jeans.

Fit

The kigo curv does run small. On the company website, they even recommend you select a pair that is ½ to 1 full size larger than your normal shoe size. I typically wear a size 7 in every pair of shoes I own, but I did end up purchasing a size 8 in this shoe (they do not make half sizes). Find the right size for your foot and you will be a happy camper!

Easy Use / Easy Care

The kigo curv is easy to put on and take off, thanks to a fixed webbing loop on the heel. The shoe is also water and stain resistant (EPA approved) and the EVA insole is removable and anti-microbial. For as much as I wear them, I really haven’t noticed any extreme dirtiness. Looking at the pictures I’ve shared, you can see what they look like after three months of wear. You could just use a wet cloth to wipe them down.

Non-Slip Grip

Nobody wants a slippery shoe, especially pregnant women! The kigo curv’s rubber outsole has non-slip grooving as well as a protective rubber toe cap. This is especially nice when having to make a quick dart after your toddler or walking on wet surfaces.

Eco-Friendly

To me, the icing on the cake for the kigo curv is knowing that the company is eco-friendly. Their shoes feature post-consumer composition, including water-based adhesives, recycled nylon lining, and non-toxic dyes. They also have CYCLEPET uppers, which means plastic jugs are cleaned, broken down, and woven into strong, soft fabric. How cool is that!

For packaging, there is only minimal tissue and a downsized recycled box; only what is necessary to protect your new shoes.

Price

The kigo curv shoes retail for around $70, which is reasonable considering you may need just this one pair of shoes! If you check out the Natural Running Store (below) they do have periodic discounts.

Where to Purchase

I bought my kigo curvs from the Natural Running Store. They provide fast shipping and great customer service. If you “Like” them on Facebook, you can find out about special discounts that are offered periodically.

Summary

Whether you are a true outdoor adventurer loving to hike, climb, and paddle your way through challenges to reach great happiness, or a mommy adventurer tackling those day-to-day challenges that test your skills and also bring great happiness, you can appreciate these shoes. In fact, you will forget about these shoes once they are on. And isn’t that the point? You shouldn’t be worrying about how your shoes will handle your adventures, you should be ENJOYING your adventures to the fullest!

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me at 27 weeks, wearing a shirt from Plato's Closet and shorts from Kid 2 Kid

For my readers who may not know, my husband and I are expecting baby number 2 in early September! Since this baby will be born in the exact opposite season as our first, I needed new maternity clothes: summer ones this time. Since two things I am very passionate about are saving money and helping the environment, I found a way to do both while buying myself maternity clothes. I’d love to share my secrets with you so that you too can save money and help the environment. Aaaahhh feels good on both counts, doesn’t it?!

Basic Strategy: Buy Gently Used Clothes

How does buying used clothes save money AND the environment? As you may remember from a previous article I wrote on things you can do to help the environment, it takes over 400 gallons of water to grow the cotton for an ordinary cotton shirt and 1,800 gallons of water for one pair of jeans! The next time you want to buy new clothes, think about how much energy is used to grow the cotton, make the clothes, and transport the clothes. Buying gently-used clothing saves natural resources.

When you purchase gently-used clothing, there is no new energy being used to create them. And another good thing is that all the chemicals that are added to clothing should have been washed out by now!

Where to Buy Gently-Used Maternity Clothes

Let’s face it, used maternity clothing is generally in great condition. After all, it’s only worn for about five months or so. Here are a few ideas for finding gently-used maternity clothing.

1. Borrow From Friends

The cheapest place to get used maternity clothing is to borrow it from friends! I had several people loan me clothing during my first pregnancy and it was a huge help!

2. Garage Sales and Craigslist

The next cheapest places to buy gently-used maternity clothing would be garage sales or on Craigslist. Garage sales may be hit or miss as far as size, style, condition, and selection. But if there are some in your neighborhood, it doesn’t hurt to check them out! The great thing about Craigslist is that you can do a search for a brand name and/or size. It might help you narrow your options down.

3. Resale Stores

My favorite place for buying gently-used maternity clothing has been resale stores, mainly Kid to Kid. Most of the shirts I found were $4-5, shorts were $3-5, and crop pants were maybe $6-7. They have common maternity brands such as Liz Lange, Old Navy, Gap, Motherhood, etc. They also have a great selection of specialty items like nursing shirts, swimming suits, career outfits, special occasion dresses, etc.

While you may not think that paying $15-20 for a pair of new Liz Lange shorts at Target is too expensive, I would much rather spend $3 for a gently-used pair, as I did for the pair I am wearing in the top photo.

You just might be surprised at how many items of clothing you can find that still have their original tags on them. I saw a dressy Pea in the Pod spaghetti strap shirt with its original tags on, showing a price of $90! Kid 2 Kid was selling it for $10. A few weeks later it was still there and now marked down 25%. Yes, you could have bought that $90 brand new shirt for $7.50!

Here are a few clothing resale stores; check for these and others in your area by doing an online search:

• Kid to Kid: They mainly carry clothes, toys, and gear for babies and kids, but also have a decent maternity section.
• Once Upon a Child: Another children’s resale shop that also carries maternity clothes.
• Clothes Mentor: Resale store for all women size 0 to 26 and including maternity.
• Plato’s Closet: Resale store for brand name teen and twenty-something fashion. They do not carry maternity clothes, but see my note below.

my Plato's Closet shirt, Kid 2 Kid crop pants, and hand-me-down shoes my sister gave me

Note about Plato’s Closet: Even though they do not carry maternity clothes, I found this a great place to find some shirts to wear during this pregnancy! I just looked for shirts that would accommodate a big belly; some regular shirts do have a style that works well for pregnancy. I found this to be a great way to get some shirts for early pregnancy, when you are too big for your regular clothes but aren’t big enough to fill out the true maternity shirts (unless you want piles of fabric flowing around you). Also, it may help to look for shirts in a size bigger than you normally wear. These shirts may not take you all the way to the end of your pregnancy, but can get you pretty far – and increase your selection of fun shirts!

Check out the pictures of me on this page. Both show me wearing regular shirts I found at Plato’s Closet! I think I paid $4-5 for the brown one and maybe $5-6 for the green one.

4. Seasonal Consignment Sales

My area has several big seasonal children’s consignment sales, usually held twice a year (spring and fall). Divine Consign is a big one in my area and Just Between Friends is a big national franchise. These usually also have a good maternity clothes selection. For these big consignment sales, people can tag and bring their used clothing and gear they want to sell. There are several benefits to this:

• Shoppers find better prices than resale stores.
• The seller/consignor (you) usually gets a better price than if they sold their items to a resale shop. For example, you might get 70% of your sales.
• The variety and quality of items is better than a garage sale.

To find a seasonal children’s consignment sale in your area, check out this website I found that has national listings by state.

5. eBay

For specific, name brand maternity clothes, ebay might be the way to go. This is a good way to get higher-end, expensive brand maternity clothing at a good price.

Any Other Ideas?

Does anyone have any other ideas? If so, please share with us by commenting!

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As I mentioned in Part 1 of this series on demystifying midwife-supported natural childbirth, safety is one of the most common misconceptions about midwife-supported childbirth, especially for out-of-hospitals births (like mine was). I know it’s the question I get asked the most often.

Since there is so much information about risks with hospital births, safety of midwives, and ways midwives promote safe childbirth I am dividing this information up into two articles.

• This article will focus on a higher-level discussion of the safety of midwife-attended births while also highlighting the risks with hospital births, which many people may not be aware of.
• The second article will follow in a few days and will describe in more detail the specific ways midwives promote safer childbirth.

Before we discuss the safety of midwife-supported natural childbirth, especially in out-of-hospitals births, let’s take a look at what most people in America consider the safest place and the safest way to give birth: in hospitals with surgeons.

Current State of Childbirth in America

There are four million births in the United States each year, with 99% of births occurring in hospitals and over 90% attended by surgeons. Maternity care affects large numbers of women. It is also big business, totaling $20 billion a year.

• The United States has the highest per capita spending on health care in the world.
• Care for mothers and newborns combined is the fourth largest category of hospital expenses.
• Childbirth is the most common reason for the hospitalization of women in the United States.

Common hospital practice is to speed up and control the birthing process, therefore nearly all women giving birth in hospitals are subjected to some level of technological or medical intervention, even though medical evidence shows that the routine use of unnecessary interventions put mothers and babies at risk.

Citizens for Midwifery list the most common interventions:

• Over 31% Cesarean Surgeries – Has risen over 50% since 1996 (highest ever)
• Vaginal Birth after Cesarean (VBAC) rate has fallen over 50% since 1996 (access is disappearing)
• 34% of Labors Medically Induced
• 41% Need Vaginal Stitching (episiotomy, tears, vacuum extraction, forceps)
• 47% of Labors Artificially Stimulated
• 60% of Women Denied Fluids
• 76% of Women Restrained In Bed
• 85% of Women Denied Food
• 86% Given Drugs For Pain Relief
• Over 90% of Women Attached To Electronic Fetal Monitors

Case in point, Ricki Lake shares an astounding fact she discovered while making the movie The Business of Being Born:

I was surprised to find out C-sections maxed out at 4 p.m. and 10 p.m. (doctors want to go home or not have to stay through the night waiting for a baby to be born).

If we had better outcomes to show for it, perhaps this would be more acceptable. Unfortunately, our outcomes are not nearly as good as those of developed countries that rely more heavily on midwifery care. The United States has:

• A high infant mortality rate compared to other developed countries (29th in the world).
• A maternal mortality rate that has not improved in 20 years (25th in the world, one of the highest in the developed world).

Risks With Hospital Births

Despite 75 years of routine hospitalization for birth there are still no reputable studies or scientific evidence showing that hospitals are the safest option. In fact, there are numerous reputable studies showing the various risks and hazards of hospital birth.

Since most women choose to birth in a hospital setting due to its presumed safer environment, many might be unaware that there are risks associated with many hospital birth practices. One study compared an equally matched number of midwife-attended home births to hospital births.

The study found that women birthing in hospitals were:

• five times more likely to have high blood pressure during labor
• nine times more likely to tear
• three times more likely to hemorrhage
• and three times more likely to undergo cesarean sections

Hospital-born babies were:

• six times more likely to suffer fetal distress before birth
• four times more likely to need assistance to start breathing
• four times more likely to develop infections

Does that information surprise you? I shared the information with you to open your eyes to the current birthing situation in the United States so that perhaps you will be more open to hearing about a perfectly safe and valid way to have babies: with the care of a midwife.

Is Midwife-Attended Birth Safe? Yes!

Regarding home birth, the best research continues to show that home birth for women with low-risk healthy pregnancies, attended by a qualified birth attendant, is no more risky than birth in the hospital.

“Every study that has compared midwives and obstetricians has found better outcomes for midwives for same-risk patients. In some studies, midwives actually served higher risk populations than the physicians and still obtained lower mortalities and morbidities. The superiority and safety of midwifery for most women no longer needs to be proven. It has been well established.” (Madrona, Lewis & Morgaine, The Future of Midwifery in the United States, NAPSAC News, Fall-Winter, 1993, p.30)

There are many aspects to consider when talking about safety in childbirth.

Type of Safety: Perinatal Mortality

From Citizens for Midwifery: Perinatal mortality (fetal death after 20 weeks of gestation plus infant death up to 28 days of age) is more relevant to the discussion of home birth safety than infant mortality, since the quality of prenatal care and effectiveness or harm of birth practices can contribute to this outcome.

Home and hospital have similar perinatal mortality rates for populations of mothers who are “low risk”. So by that standard, planned home births and hospital births are equally safe for babies of healthy mothers.

Type of Safety: Maternal Mortality

Despite the highest per capita spending on health care in the world, the United States has a maternal mortality rate that has not improved in 20 years (25th in the world, one of the highest in the developed world).

There is good evidence that overall cesarean rates should be about 15%. Cesareans are major abdominal surgeries that carry an array of health risks and consequences. Recent studies have found that though overall rates are low, maternal death occurs 2 to 4 times more frequently with cesarean section than with vaginal birth.

• The average rate of cesarean for all hospital births is now over 30%.
• As of 2000, the average rate of cesarean was around 20% for women who were “low risk” when they entered the hospital.
• Fewer than 5% of planned, midwife-attended home births end in cesarean.

For a healthy mother, her chances of avoiding a cesarean (and having a better outcome) are increased by choosing care with a midwife.

Type of Safety: Maternal and Infant Morbidity

Injury or illness associated with the birth for mother and baby (morbidity) is another important component of safety. A recent study indicated that over 40% of women birthing in a hospital experience some level of morbidity related to childbirth.

Morbidity for the baby can include:

• bruising or lacerations from operative deliveries (cesarean section, forceps or vacuum extraction)
• breathing difficulties due to drugs or pulmonary immaturity
• infection from exposure to hospital germs
• complications related to late preterm birth from elective inductions and cesareans

Morbidity for the mother can include:

• fever
• infection
• drug reactions
• surgical incisions from cesarean section
• lacerations of the perineum (from tearing or episiotomy a surgical cut to the perineum)
• drugs used in labor (to induce and/or speed up labor, and for pain) can cause a range of complications for both mother and baby

The problems listed above occur because of the medical interventions used in a hospital setting. By birthing at home with a midwife, the chances for these common birth injuries can be reduced.

Better Outcomes With Midwives

Midwifery clients experience lower rates of:

• induced labor
• electronic fetal monitoring
• epidural analgesia
• assisted vaginal delivery (forceps and vacuum extractions)
• Cesarean sections
• episiotomies
• infections
• bleeding
• babies born requiring resuscitation

Because women choosing home birth with a midwife have far fewer interventions during their labor, birth and immediate postpartum period, they also have easier healing, breastfeeding, and bonding with their new babies.

What If Something Happens?

This question alone shows how most people view birth and laboring women: like a ticking time bomb, just waiting for something bad to happen, almost like it’s guaranteed. Let me remind you again that birth is a normal physiological process. As women, our bodies know how to birth babies.

Midwives recognize that birth is a normal, healthy process. Midwives focus more on women and babies as individuals and less on technology.

While I can’t go over every potential birth complication and the ways a midwife would handle them, I can share the following general information:

• Most of the complications seen in hospital births are actually caused by all the interventions used. With midwife-attended births, most complications are avoided because of the method that they deliver babies – naturally.

• Midwives are well-trained to recognize signs of complications developing and are able to handle most of them. (Not every problem requires a trip to the hospital; sometimes, just a change in the mother’s position or re-hydration solves the problem.)

• If there are developing complications, midwives also assess the need to transport for medical care well in advance, in the rare cases where it is needed. Serious complications almost never occur without some preceding signs that there is a problem.

• Midwives are trained in emergency procedures and have necessary medical equipment at hand in case something serious happens. They carry IVs, oxygen, tubes to help breathing, pitocin for hemorrhaging, suturing supplies, and are fully trained in resuscitation.

In the European countries with the lowest infant mortality rates, more than 70% of all births are attended by midwives. More than 50% of all babies born in the Netherlands are born at home with midwives in attendance, and the Dutch infant death rate is much lower than in the United States.

Most Common Reasons for Hospital Transfer

According to one study, 12.1% of women transferred to the hospital during their planned home births. Only 3.4% of those were considered an emergency by the midwives. Most of the hospital transfers were during labor and due to:

• maternal exhaustion
• request for pain relief
• failure to progress
• other non-emergency situations

What About Those Medical Interventions?

With the mention of “fewer medical interventions” with midwife-supported natural childbirth, I bet some of you are confused. After all, aren’t all those interventions used in a hospital good? Aren’t they justified to protect the babies, even if they are hard on the moms? Hospitals wouldn’t use them unless they were necessary and safe, right?

WRONG!

Even though medical interventions are well-meaning, their risks and complications are often ignored. Each intervention carries significant risk of harm to the natural process and to the mother and/or baby. In addition, the use of any intervention tends to lead to other interventions, in a cascading effect.

A thorough knowledge of birth allows midwives to minimize the use of technology and medical interventions.

Medical interventions are costly, largely unnecessary, and frequently harmful. Here is a table that provides an easy way to compare labor and birth data between the World Health Organization’s (WHO) recommendations, planned homebirth, and hospital birth.

¹ World Health Organization Recommendations, Ideals vs. Reality in U.S. Births on Citizens for Midwifery

² 2005: “Outcomes of planned home births with certified professional midwives: large prospective study in North America.” Kenneth C Johnson and Betty-Anne Daviss.  BMJ  2005;330:1416 (18 June)

³ 2005: State of American Childbirth on Citizens for Midwifery

* 2004 National Hospital Discharge Survey

Conclusion

I hope I’ve shed some light on the facts that show how safe birth with a midwife is. I believe that having all the information is important for an expectant mom so that she can make an informed choice for herself and her birth.

Don’t forget to watch for the following article on the ways midwives promote safe childbirth.

More Information:

• The Thinking Woman’s Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer
• The Business of Being Born movie
• 10 Homebirth Facts No One’s Telling You on Blinded By The Light
• Why Homebirths Are Worth Considering by Melissa Cheyney on the Huffington Post
• Birth By the Numbers on OrgasmicBirth.com (great video)
• Birth Misconceptions: Myth and Fact on Birthingthefuture.org
• Ideals vs. Reality in U.S. Births by Citizens for Midwifery
• Cesarean section rates by state on The Unnecesarean
• Overview of Maternity Care in the US on Citizens for Midwifery
• Safety in Childbirth on Citizens for Midwifery
• State of American Childbirth on Citizens for Midwifery
• Overused Interventions

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Related Articles:

• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 3: Who Chooses Midwifery Care?
• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 1: Misconceptions and Facts About Midwives
• 8 Ways Midwives Promote Safe Childbirth
• The Rights of Childbearing Women
• Evidence-Based Maternity Care Report Released

Women’s strongest feelings [in terms of their birthings], positive and negative, focus on the way they were treated by their caregivers. ~Annie Kennedy & Penny Simkin

Normally when I tell people I birthed my son in a freestanding birth center with a midwife attending, I am met with either blank stares, a confused “Oh” with a head nod, or else a barrage of questions, depending on how well I know the person. (And who knows what kind of reactions I get behind my back!) I know the reason I get these reactions is because birthing outside a hospital setting is not the norm in the United States and people just don’t know there’s another way to do things!

our midwife, me, and our son approximately 4 hours after birth (shortly before going home)

Since I am so passionate about it, I thought I would create a five-part series on my blog to demystify midwife-supported natural childbirth. I will seek to shed some light on common questions such as:

• What is a midwife and what do they do?
• Is it safe?
• What if something goes wrong?
• Who chooses to birth this way?
• Why do people want to birth this way?
• What is prenatal care like?
• What about the pain during labor?

Common Misconceptions About Midwives

Many people still think a midwife is the old woman from the village who tells everyone to get hot water and clean towels, rather than someone who’s truly trained. When you hear about midwives attending births today, what do you think? I bet many of you think one or more of the following:

• All midwives are the same.
• That’s old fashioned.
• Having a midwife is not as safe as having a doctor.
• Midwives don’t have any formal training.
• Midwives only attend home births.
• You can only see a midwife if you are pregnant.
• You can’t get prenatal tests if you have a midwife.
• You can’t have an epidural if you have a midwife.

Before I address some of these misconceptions, let’s get some background information about midwives.

What is a Midwife?

The word midwife means “with woman” and a midwife’s philosophy of care is one that is directed at the woman and her individual reproductive needs. As part of this woman-centered model of care, a midwife usually offers a variety of options and seeks to eliminate or minimize unnecessary interventions. This philosophy of care is represented by the Midwives Model of Care:

• Monitoring the physical, psychological, and social well-being of the mother throughout the childbearing cycle
• Providing the mother with individualized education, counseling, and prenatal care, continuous hands-on assistance during labor and delivery, and postpartum support
• Minimizing technological interventions
• Identifying and referring women who require obstetrical attention

Basically, the midwife nurtures the family through a normal, physiological process.

Differences Between a Midwife and a Doctor

It (birthing) is not a medical event. There is almost no hope of a peaceful pregnancy and joyous birth within the medical system. Every woman needs and deserves the kind of nurturing and care a midwife provides.  ~Jan Tritten

Since many people are familiar with how a doctor handles pregnancy and birth, here is a brief comparison between doctors and midwives to shed some light on midwifery style.

• Midwives believe that birth is normal, until proven otherwise. Doctors believe that birth is complicated, until proven otherwise.

• Midwives believe that childbirth is a natural event, requiring medical intervention only in special circumstances.

• Midwives provide prenatal care and are also the birth attendants. This means they often stay with patients throughout the labor rather than showing up to catch the baby at the end.

• Doctors are surgeons and deal with complications. Midwives do not do surgery, but they are better trained in natural birth and use techniques that are no longer taught in medical schools (often because the hospitals want to go right to C-sections).

• Midwives are also more likely than doctors to encourage natural birth practices such as unmedicated birth, birthing positions, and drug-free pain relief techniques.

• Midwives also usually allow women to eat and drink during labor.

my midwife and I at my 38 weeks appointment

Misconception: All midwives are the same.

Fact: There are two main categories of midwives in the United States: Certified Nurse-Midwives (CNMs) and Direct Entry Midwives (DEM). They differ in education and licensing requirements.

• Certified Nurse Midwives (CNMs): Educated in both nursing and midwifery, CNMs possess at least a bachelor’s degree and have completed a university-affiliated nurse-midwifery program accredited by the American College of Nurse-Midwives, and passed the exam. CNMs are legal and can be licensed in all states; most practice in hospitals and birth centers. In most states CNMs must have some kind of agreement with a doctor for consultation and referral; practicing without such an agreement can lead to loss of license.

• Direct-Entry Midwives (including Licensed Midwives): Have trained in midwifery through self-study, apprenticeships, midwifery school, or a college program and are especially prepared to attend births in out-of-hospital settings (freestanding birth centers and individual homes). They may or may not be certified by a state or national organization. Their legal status varies according to state; they are licensed or regulated in 27 states. In most states licensed midwives are not required to have any practice agreement with a doctor.

• Certified Professional Midwife (CPM): One type of Direct-Entry Midwife, CPMs are midwives who have trained in midwifery and are certified by the North American Registry of Midwives. CPMs must have completed education in several core areas as well as practice clinical skills under the supervision of a licensed midwife. They practice most often in homes and birth centers.

For more information on the types of midwives, visit Citizens for Midwifery.

Different types of midwives will support different birth situations, also. Since CNMs have an agreement with a backup doctor it usually affects the clients they accept, accepting only those that the backup doctor would agree to backup and transferring care to the doctor when certain situations arise.

For example, due to the agreement with their backup doctor some CNMs might not accept clients for a vaginal birth after a Cesarean section (VBAC), if they are pregnant with multiples (twins, triplets, etc.), and the CNM would transfer care to the doctor at delivery if the baby is breech. The CNMs may be willing and able to attend such births, but they have to abide by the terms they agreed to with their backup doctor.

Whereas I know that many (maybe even most) CPMs will support a VBAC. I don’t know how common it is, but I have heard of local midwives who deliver twins and breech babies. They still have a backup plan in place in case one is needed, of course, but without the restrictions of a doctor they are free to accept clients of their choosing.

Misconception: That’s old fashioned.

Fact: Even though midwives have helped women give birth since the beginning of time, working with a midwife is not an old fashioned concept. Midwives are extremely knowledgeable about all modern aspects of health and childbirth. Choosing a midwife is not radically different or nonconformist. It is a viable option for childbirth.

While still a small percentage of total births, the number of births attended by midwives the United States is growing. In 2008, approximately 8.0% of births were attended by midwives, more than double the 1990 rate of 3.9%.

While physician-attended births are still the norm in the United States today, midwives attend births in most of the world. The percentage of European births attended principally by midwives is 75%. That’s quite a difference from our 8%! In fact, Europe has lower neonatal mortality rates than the United States and many people attribute that fact to who attends most births in Europe – midwives.

Misconception: Having a midwife is not as safe as having a doctor.

Fact: Research shows that midwives are the safest care providers for the majority of women with normal pregnancies and births. Midwifery clients experience lower rates of forceps and vacuum extractions, Cesarean sections, episiotomies, infections, and babies born requiring resuscitation.

Midwives deal with normal, low-risk pregnancies and therefore complications are rare. (The majority of pregnancies, about 80%, are low-risk.) If the pregnancy deviates from normal or there are medical issues, care can be transferred to an obstetrician or to a hospital, and the midwife can still be there as a supportive person in her care.

Using an obstetrician for normal birth is like using a pediatrician as a babysitter. ~birthing specialist Marsden Wagner

our midwife getting ready to perform newborn exam

Misconception: Midwives don’t have any formal training.

Fact: A midwife is not just a friend or a supporter through the birth process; midwives are highly educated medical professionals who happen to specialize in child birth and female reproductive health.

Midwives are specialists in normal birth.

CNMs attend a graduate program in midwifery — a form of medical school condensed to include specialized education in caring for pregnant women and female reproductive health.

DEMs and CPMs gain their knowledge through a variety of methods, which is usually a combination of the following: apprenticeship, workshops, self-study, a midwifery school, or a college/university program.

Certified midwives are trained in basic life support for newborns and, in the event of sudden complications with your baby after birth, can care for the baby until a pediatrician or neonatologist (an intensive-care specialist for newborns) is available.

Misconception: Midwives only attend home births.

Fact: While most CPMs and DEMs practice in out-of-hospital settings, most midwife-attended births in the United States occur in hospitals with CNMs attending. Of all the midwife-attended births in 2008, 91.6% were in a hospital and 8.3% were out of hospital (freestanding birth center or home birth).

However, there are more and more freestanding birth centers starting to appear that are run by CNMs, like the one where I birthed my son (see picture below). Freestanding birth centers are not associated with a hospital and are sterile, modern medical facilities that are often dressed up to provide a more homey atmosphere than a hospital.

The birth center where my son was born

At my birth center, I have the option of birthing at the center or at home. This is a case where a CNM does attend either a birth center or home birth, depending on where the client chooses to birth.

Misconception: You can only see a midwife if you are pregnant.

Fact: The services of a midwife depend on the certification and licensing credentials obtained and the practice restrictions within each state.

CNMs are licensed to provide prenatal care and perform deliveries, but also provide gynecological care from adolescence to menopause. These services include: annual gynecological exams, family planning and preconception care, prenatal care, labor and delivery support, newborn care, and menopausal management. Midwives generally provide reproductive education directed at fertility, nutrition and exercise, contraception, pregnancy health, breastfeeding, and quality infant care.

CNMs can prescribe medications in all 50 states.

Misconception: You can’t get prenatal tests if you have a midwife.

Fact: The tests that doctors typically provide to pregnant women — genetic screening, ultrasound, lab tests — are offered by midwives as well. Midwives also explain the purpose and potential outcome of each test before you decide whether to take it. You are able to decline certain tests if you wish (as I did). They are not required.

For example, a professional sonographer visits my birth center once a month to perform ultrasounds. If you want an ultrasound, you can have one right at the birth center.

Misconception: You can’t have an epidural if you have a midwife.

Fact: Since most of the midwife-attended births in the United States take place in a hospital, there is access to pain medication including epidurals. When it comes to using pain medication during labor, the choice is that of the laboring woman. While midwives are skilled at supporting a drug-free approach to birth, they also respect the right of the woman to choose the pain relief method she desires. If a midwife’s patient wants an epidural, the CNM would order it and the anesthesiologist would administer and monitor it.

Epidurals are not available for the 8.3% of midwife-attended births that are outside a hospital, and injected narcotics (also called opioids) are usually not available either.

However, women who want to birth without pain medications often specifically choose midwives for their ability to provide natural labor support. Midwives are skilled at helping women to labor naturally utilizing techniques such as position change, hydrotherapy (labor in water), massage, and other holistic modalities.

Conclusion

While many people may still believe birthing with a midwife is like birthing in a barn, I hope I’ve shed some light on the truly special and important type of care a midwife provides. Stay tuned for part 2 of this series, answering in more detail the questions regarding safety of midwife-supported natural childbirth.

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Related Articles:

• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 2: Safety
• Demystifying Midwife-Supported Natural Childbirth Part 3: Who Chooses Midwifery Care?
• 8 Ways Midwives Promote Safe Childbirth
• Our Sweet Daughter Has Arrived!
• The Rights of Childbearing Women

Eating

It is thought that an acidic body can cause morning sickness, or at least not help it. So it would make sense that if you avoid acidic foods and eat more alkaline foods, your body can become more alkaline and hopefully your morning sickness will leave. Check out this list of acidic and alkaline foods. Balancing your body’s pH is not only beneficial for morning sickness but for overall general health and may prevent disease. From NaturalNews.com,

Most experts suggest eating four times more from the list of alkaline foods than from the acidic foods. Don’t get stressed if you don’t achieve this, it’s an ideal to shoot for.

The most important thing we can do is to ensure that the majority of foods that we eat are fruits and vegetables.

To learn more about pH balance, NaturalNews.com has a fabulous report – a guide to acid/alkaline balance. To check your body’s pH level, you can use pH Test Strips. We use this brand and they worked great. We would test our saliva before going to bed every night (it’s better than testing in the morning, when our bodies are more acidic). The results can be seen in 30-45 seconds. By testing everyday, you can see when the results change, after changing your habits. I highly recommend this.

Another idea is that morning sickness is how the body keeps harmful toxins, including unhealthy food, away from the developing fetus. On that thought, restricting grains and sugars may be a good idea as well; sugar and soda would be very good to eliminate from your diet.

Other tips for eating include:

• Avoid fatty, fried, greasy, or highly spiced foods.
• Eat smaller meals, such as six to eight small meals instead of three larger ones.
• Don’t go for long periods of time without eating.
• Salt your food to taste. Lack of adequate salt can aggravate nausea.
• Eat enough protein; have a high-protein snack (almonds, cheese) every couple hours. Do not let your stomach get empty.

Drinking

Here are a few tips for what you can drink:

• Citrus can help (lemon in your water, unsweetened grapefruit juice).
• Drink fluids between, but not with, meals.
• Aim for 1/2 your body weight in oz. of water per day. (ie. a 140 woman should aim for 70 oz. of water each day).

Ginger

Ginger is one of the most popular and common remedies for treating morning sickness. There are many ways to get some ginger in your diet:

• Grate fresh ginger into hot water for an anti-nausea tea
• Ginger Snaps
• Ginger Candy
• Crystallized ginger
• Put real ginger in something sweet
• Drink gingerale
• Altoids Mints, Ginger flavor

Supplements

• Vitamin B6 supplements can help.
• Vitamins K and C, taken at the same time.
• Take your prenatal vitamin with food or at bedtime.

Also, make sure your prenatal vitamins are whole-food based since they are easier on your system and most bio-available for absorption. I used (and loved) New Chapter Perfect Prenatal. Another good brand is Rainbow Light. You take a tablet several times a day, which is easier (and better utilized) than once-a-day vitamins.

Alternative Treatments

Here are a few alternative treatments that have been known to be very effective in relieving morning sickness:

• Homeopathy: It is best to see a qualified homeopathic practitioner for a remedy since homeopathy is a complex system and the appropriate remedy depends on the patient’s unique symptoms. More information can be found at Hyperemesis.org as well as Altmd.com.
• Acupuncture: Acupuncture is another safe and effective treatment for morning sickness. The acupuncture point Pericardium 6 (P6) is stimulated, which is known in traditional Chinese medicine to relieve nausea.
• Acupressure:  Acupressure is similar to acupuncture; pressure is put on certain points of the body.  Acupressure in the form of wrist bands, sometimes known as sea bands, has been helpful as well. Sea Bands can be found at most drugs stores or Amazon.com.

Treats

Here are a few other things you can eat that are more like treats!

• Preggie Pop Drops – Organic: These wouldn’t be my first choice for morning sickness relief, as they are essentially sugar candy, but many people seem to like them and say they work. Originally created as lollipops, they now come in candy drop form. (Notice I just included a link to their organic version since their original version has a few ingredients that I don’t like.)
• Popsicles: Real fruit frozen popsicles might help as well, especially lemonade.

Other Remedies

• Put drops of lavender or peppermint essential oil in an aromatherapy diffuser or humidifier to scent the air.
• Rest as much as you can. Too much activity can aggravate nausea.

Wendy - Parenting Tips 365

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And yes, I realize that all a new baby really needs is something to eat, something to wear, some sort of diaper, a roof over her head, and lots of love. But I know there are other things that you will want to get and with the abundance of “stuff” available, it’s pretty overwhelming to sort through it all.

When I was pregnant I asked all my friends and family with kids (which was all our friends and family) for their opinions on baby gear. I also asked other mommies online. I asked anyone who would listen to me! I read books about baby gear. I wanted to be smart about this. I’ve compiled a list of what I found out; that is, recommended baby products and products you can live without.

Of course this is all subjective; what might be a ‘must have’ by one person could be a ‘live without’ by another. I formed these lists based on the most common answers I got; along with a bit of my own opinion! I understand that what works for your family might be completely different. So with that disclaimer out of the way, here is what I recommend:

WHAT TO GET

Dresser as a Changing Table
Many people, myself included, like to have a dedicated spot to change diapers. My husband and I wanted to be more practical about it so we purchased a dresser for our child; we found one that he could use until he leaves the house. Right now it’s used as a changing table; we place a changing pad on one end of it and diapering supplies on the other end. When he is no longer wearing diapers, it will become his dresser for clothes as he grows.

dresser as a changing table

Bouncy Seat

If you ever want to take a shower, or just need to put the baby somewhere for a few minutes, these little seats work so well. Babies can bounce, play with toys, or snooze. I brought ours into the bathroom and that’s where I put my son while I showered; we could see each other and all was well. There are many on the market, ranging from simple to fancy. I think a simple one would do just fine; at least get one that has a cover that is easy to take off and wash.

I had this infant-to-toddler rocker and was happy with it. But check out how neat this zen infant seat looks; I love the colors!

G having fun in his seat: 6 weeks

G sitting up: 6 months

Nursing Bra

If you’re going to breastfeed (and I sincerely hope you are) you will need good nursing bras; ones without underwire and that fit you well. If you go to Motherhood Maternity, they can help you find the correct size. Don’t forget about sleep bras; they are important too! The girls need support at night; especially in the early months! And when you find a nursing bra you like, buy several. Although I didn’t see this organic cotton nursing bra until recently, it sure looks great to me!

Ultimate Crib Sheet

It’s a fact, babies have accidents in the middle of the night. And I can tell you that it’s not much fun to change sheets in the middle of the night. But once I found the ultimate crib sheet, that part of my life was easier! This sheet fastens on top of your crib sheet and there’s no need to remove the bumpers. It is waterproof so it protects your mattress as well. If baby has an accident, just take this sheet off and you have the regular sheet below it.

Baby Monitor with Dual Receiver

It really is nice to have two receivers for the baby monitor. We keep one in our bedroom and one around the house. The one we got has a clip so you can clip it to your waist and walk around with it. It lasts many hours before needing recharging. The lights on it are nice, too, if we want to turn the volume down. We got this one from Fisher-Price and have been happy with it.

Crib Soother

We received this Fisher-Price rainforest waterfall crib soother as a gift and it’s been one of our favorite things. When our son was a tiny baby, we just turned on the background sounds, which were forest noises. As he got older, we changed settings for different music and motions. He loved it! He would watch it and it helped him go to sleep on his own. And when he wakes up in the middle of the night, I hear him turn this on and it soothes him back to sleep. We are fans!

Many of my friends have said the same thing about crib soothers; here are a few other crib soothers I found on Amazon.com.

G engaged with waterfall soother: 9 months

Medela Breast Pump

If you are going to breastfeed, even if you are staying at home, chances are you will need to pump at some point. (Mama’s gotta have a night out sometimes, right?!) Many friends have told me to skip a manual pump or a cheaper brand – and get a Medela! I took my friends’ advice; I have the Medela Pump in Style breast pump and have been very happy with it.

Stroller Frame

When your baby is tiny and still in an infant car seat, I highly recommend getting a stroller frame instead of a big stroller. You can use one of those down the road if you like, but when everything was new to me I loved the ease of using this lightweight frame. The infant car seat snaps into this frame and it has lots of storage below. You will want to be sure your infant car seat fits with this frame; there are several stroller frames on the market.

Sling

Another great option for keeping your hands free with a little one is to wear them in a sling. There are many wonderful slings on the market and babywearing is a growing trend. Here are some of my favorites:

• I have the Moby Wrap and love it! I didn’t get it until my son was four months old and I wish I had it sooner. The baby stays so snug and close to you in this wrap; your hands are free to do what you need to do. I used this wrap to help him fall asleep. Once I was wearing him I would sing and pat his bottom. Once he fell asleep, I would unwrap it and transfer him to his crib. Magic! It also makes a great baby shower gift.

• Another popular option is the Hotsling. There are several ways to wear this sling as your baby grows. It’s great for out in public; easy in and easy out! Plus there are many great colors and designs; it’s a new fashion accessory!

• Many of my friends had the Maya Wrap. This sling is easy to use, comes in many colors, and is great for nursing. Many slings are great for nursing.

me wearing G in Moby wrap: 4 months old

Exersaucer

Another popular item is an exersaucer. Once the baby is old enough to use these, they are another great option if you need to free up your hands for a few minutes. There are many toys for the baby’s entertainment and they rock a bit if baby pushes with his feet.

Infant Tub

We really liked this infant tub, and we liked having a tub in general. This one had a sling for the early days, a recline position, and a sit up position. When he was about eight or nine months old, we moved this tub into another tub for baths before graduating to just a regular tub. It served us well over the months and I recommend it.

Nursing Pillow

I almost didn’t add this one to the list; mainly because I didn’t use one and was fine. But I know MANY friends who used one and loved it, and since I am all for anything that helps a mom with breastfeeding, I decided to add it. I would recommend the My Brest Friend nursing pillow, since it’s flat and easier to use (I’ve heard). But many people like the popular Boppy. (Did you see that they now have an organic cotton slipcover for the Boppy? Awesome! If you saw my previous post on organic cotton, then you know how great this is!)

Note: I did have a My Brest Friend pillow and used it for a day, but then I got breastfeeding help from a lactation consultant and was able to nurse successfully without needing the pillow at all (20.5 months and counting)!

WHAT TO FORGET

Wipes Warmer

This item was one that was almost unanimous. It dries out the wipes and let’s face it, it’s another gadget to have cluttering up your house. If you are concerned about the temperature of the wipes, hold them in your hands for a few seconds to warm them up before wiping the baby.

Big High Chair

I give you permission to skip buying a big high chair. You may think you need one, but there is another option. The big high chairs take up room in your kitchen and are hard to clean, especially if the padded seat is made of cloth. What we did, and so did several of my friends, was to use a booster seat strapped to a chair at your table. The booster seat is adjustable in height and the tray is adjustable too. Also, the tray is small enough to wash in the sink. Once we introduced solids to our son (at eight months) this is where he sat – and he’s still there today!

G in the booster seat: 12 months old

G in booster seat : 20 months

Expensive Diaper Pail System

Forget the Diaper Genie pails and the like. The pails themselves are expensive but don’t forget about refills; those will add up! And I personally think they are a bit complicated to use. We have this simple diaper pail and it’s been great. We use grocery sacks in ours since we have many of those and they are free. You can put an air freshener in it if you like. Or better yet, put some baking soda or essential oils in it for the odor. Be sure to change it often; at least once a day. (You can see our diaper pail in the picture of the changing table above; it’s on the left of the table.)

Crib Mobile

Everyone thinks they need a crib mobile to complete their nursery, but trust me; you don’t. They kind of get in the way and are hard to store. If you want something in the crib for baby’s entertainment, get a crib soother (like I mentioned earlier).

Expensive Crib

Unless you have lots of money to burn, you really don’t need an expensive crib. If you like the cribs with storage underneath, there are many other ways to incorporate storage into your nursery. Perhaps some storage baskets underneath the crib would work well. You might also want to skip the crib that doubles as a toddler bed. Yes, it might be convenient but for many people who have more kids, you will need it as a crib again before you could use it as a toddler bed.

Small Clothes

There are several recommendations I have for baby clothes, especially in small sizes (0-3 and 3-6 months):

• Don’t buy too many clothes in sizes 0-3 and 3-6 months. We didn’t have to buy any in this size as we received many for gifts. This is a time of rapid growth for your baby and they may grow out of the clothes faster than they can wear them out.
• Skip the infant jeans or jean overalls. They may be cute, but they are not comfy.
• Forget the baby shoes. Socks are just fine for this age.
• You don’t need many dress-up outfits in this size range. Let’s face it, babies just want to be comfortable; and chances are they aren’t going to many fancy places.
• Skip the baby bath robes. A nice towel is sufficient. And at this age, we pretty much want to dry them off as fast as we can and get them dressed and warm again. I don’t know how much they want to lounge around in a robe!

Fancy Infant Bedding

I know how tempting it is to see all the pretty infant bedding sets for sale; you want a beautiful room for your beautiful baby! But the truth is that babies don’t really care if they have a complete nursery set from the most expensive store. Babies will poop and spit up and vomit all over it no matter what it cost or where it’s from. You can still have a nice nursery with a simple crib sheet, breathable bumper, and nicely painted walls, with maybe a few pictures.

Speaking of bedding, books recommend getting eight crib sheets. You don’t need that many; two or three is plenty. Especially if you have them in rotation with the ultimate crib sheet, like I mentioned earlier.

Sleep Positioners

I don’t have much to say here except that these are not necessary. We got by just fine without them.

Special Laundry Detergent

You don’t have to buy that special laundry detergent for baby’s clothes. We already used a laundry detergent that is non-toxic, hypo-allergenic, and free of dyes. There are several kinds of similar laundry detergents on the market; you can find one you like and use it on the whole family’s laundry.

Disposable Changing Pad Covers

Let’s help out the environment and try to buy less disposable things when we can. I just put this portable changing pad on top of a changing table when I need to.

Swing

We had the swing that was low to the ground, and although that seems to be the way to go (versus a large one), we just didn’t use it. We had plenty of other ways to entertain our son. I know many people love the swing, but I would say that you can forget this piece of equipment.

I hope this list has given you some information you can use. Feel free to use it as a guide for what to register for. Or a guide for what to buy a friend.

Wendy - Parenting Tips 365

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